Time and Timing

Originally begun January 25, 2017.......

I was struck by a detail of the story of Issac today. I've read this story many times, but today, as I was reading, the Holy Spirit gave revelation. I need revelation these days, because it's been hard to process what He is doing and where He is leading us as a family. It's been hard to wait, to listen and honestly, to hear. And I'm frustrated that it's been hard to hear. Yet I know He will speak as I am still. But being still has been hard....but that's for another time to write about.

Abraham was faithful to send out his servant to find a wife for Issac. His servant had instructions to go to his family and find a wife. His servant carried all sorts of gifts for the family of the girl he would, by faith, find for his master. He carried what he needed for himself for the journey, as well as all the gifts for her, and for her family on camels as he made the trek. Finally, he ends up at a place where he can rest, where his camels can rest, and he calls on the name of the Lord, asking Him to identify a wife for Issac. He asks that the wife of God's own choosing would be the one who would offer to water his camels, which would be no small feat. Rebekah comes to the watering spot with her own sheep, and after giving water to the servant, offers to water the camels. After he finds out she belongs to Abraham's family, he makes request of her family that she journey back with him to marry Issac. Her family agrees if she agrees. She agrees, and leaves her family, her home, all she has ever known, to journey back with the servant to meet her new husband, and live with him and raise a family.

Issac is the Son of Promise. He knows his own life came about because of the sovereignty of God Himself. He knows he will have descendants as numerous as the stars. He knows the covenant God made with his father Abraham. Issac knows that through his own children, this covenant will continue.

Some time passes. No children. A few years pass. No children. A decade passes. No children. Two decades pass. No children.

My mind was struck by this today. God made a promise. Issac believed it. Rebekah left everything she knew to be the wife of Issac, and I have to think she had a belief in God, had to have a sense of destiny to leave all she knew to become Issac's wife. She went to a land barren of friends, of family, of everything familiar to be.... barren.

What could those years have been like for her? What did she battle in her mind? What regrets did she have, what prayers did she cry out to God? What promises did she cling to? What comfort did she have as day after day, year after year, her purpose, her reason for leaving all she knew, never came to bear, to light? There had to have been a purpose for her too, a reason for the delay. There must have been much the Lord spoke to her as she waited, as Issac waited. Or maybe I just imagine this to be true, want this to be true as I so identify with her situation. But God is a God of Hope, and though Scripture doesn't record what her thoughts about the wait were, she must have been crying out to Him, and I know He heard her.

We know that Issac prayed for her, and she conceived. What were those 9 months like, as she literally felt the promise grow within her? And as the "war within her" of twins grew, before she knew they were twins, what were now her thoughts? Was she afraid she would lose the baby? Did she cry out to God, wondering why this, after such a delay?

5 Months Later

I began this post over 5 months ago, and just now, as I am prepping for another post, saw that I had yet to finish this one. I began writing that as we were in the midst of one probably the hardest seasons our family has ever experienced. We had no home of our own, part time work for both of us, a very clear call on our lives that came after 20 days of fasting and prayer, with no foreseeable resources of our own to "make it happen." We had friends who empathized but no partners in the vision. We had Job friends who thought it must be something we had done to cause such calamity in our lives, and shared this openly with us. And we would soon have people specifically speaking against what God had spoken to us, people we had loved and shared life with.

Like Rebekah, I left everything good to come to Hershey. I had deep friendships in Indiana, joy in serving in my sweet spots, love, others who were on mission and with whom we kept pace, vision for the future, security of a beautiful home with land and a garden that even provided shelter for a young couple living with us. Like Rebekah, we left everything dear to follow what we thought was a promise. Like Rebekah, 5 months ago I asked, "If this is so, why then am I this way?" Why do we find ourselves without a home, without what we thought of as security, struggle with those we had loved, struggle within ourselves. All I could do was cling to the hope that there had to be a reason. God is Faithful. That's all I knew.

What I would say to myself 5 months ago is.... hold on. Things you could not even conceive will happen in a very short amount of time. Within 3 weeks you will be in your new home, (the small kind, the one of your dreams, with hydrangeas, rhododendron, clementis, azaleas, all your favorite perennials, just for you.) People you don't know yet will become key influencers in your life. God will visit others in dreams and tell them about you to encourage and heal you in one of your darkest moments. He will give you mentors to walk out the command to church plant. He will deliver you of strongholds. Your joy will exponentially increase. You will be invited into a body of believers who are closing the gap between what the Bible depicts as the "normal" christian life and what you see in the typical American church. He will open financial resources to follow His call to church plant. He will send you on adventures that require courage but will increase faith and joy. You will see others healed through you. He will be EXACTLY who He says He is and empower you to be EXACTLY who HE says you are... not whom others say or expect you to be.

Oh for the perspective of time in the waiting! Courage dear hearts, as you follow Jesus and wait for His timing!