Flowers

This story may be a little hard to believe... for me it's pure joy, and such an affirmation that any one of us can grow in our ability to hear the Voice of our Father. If you know me at all, you will know that I believe every good and perfect gift comes down from our Father, and it is absolutely for us to enjoy... but not just for us. Every time you see God at work, that is for you, for your faith and joy, but not just for you. We are to freely give what we have been freely given. We hear the Voice of our Shepherd not only for ourselves, but for the joy and faith of others. That's my heart in sharing this story.

Driving home a few months ago from Myerstown, I knew I needed to stop at Sharp Shopper to pick up some groceries. Google Maps led me through downtown Middletown, for which I was thankful. I'd never seen it, thinking Main Street was mostly all there was to Middletown. About 5 minutes away from Sharp Shopper, I passed a little church called Grace & Mercy. At that time I didn't notice the name, just a man outside doing some yard work. As I looked at him, something in my spirit noticed him. It was like God highlighted him for a minute. Usually when this happens, I know God is about to say something to me about that person. I always hope it's just to pray :) but He more often asks me to stop and give a specific word of encouragement.

This time though, the word didn't come so quickly. I passed on by the church and came upon a stop light. I remember saying, "Lord, this light is going to turn quickly and I will have to turn, so if there is something You'd like for me to say, I need to know it soon." This wasn't impertinence:) This was a daughter knowing her Father was giving her an adventure and teasing Him a bit.

As I made the left turn toward Sharp Shopper, I heard Him say one simple word, "Flowers." That took me by surprise. "Flowers? You want me to get him some flowers?(affirmation in my spirit)  ummm.....okay." And off I went to the grocery store. I was pretty confident I wouldn't find flowers at the store, and actually took my time shopping. This is a grocery outlet store, so you never really know what you will find. I also had a budget, so again, I took my time, trading this for that, making sure I had what I needed on my list, putting things back and putting things in... on and on.

After checking out, I asked the Lord where I should get flowers. CVS and Sheets were a block away, and I knew I would have a better shot at buying flowers at Sheets. I walked in there, and asked God which flowers... this or that bouquet? I sort of got impatient with myself...if you are not already:) Just get the flowers Nicole.

Getting into the car and heading back to the church, I suddenly had a "come to Jesus" moment. Only this was literal. "Father.... wait a second. I can't just waltz up to some random guy and hand him flowers. That's too weird! Father, You have to give me a word for him too... You have to give me something to encourage him." In telling this story to my husband later, he said, "It took you that long to realize you couldn't just give a guy flowers??" What can I say? :) Yes, it was then that I realized I needed a word as well.

God shared with me that what this man was doing was not simply gardening. He was cultivating, growing things. And the labor he was putting in would one day pay off. It was not about the literal physical work he was doing... it was about what he had been called to do in the Body of Christ. I assumed then this man was not only the lawn guy, but a pastor as well.

Satisfied with that, I drove toward the church with my bouquet of fresh flowers. Usually when the Lord makes me stop and give a word of encouragement to someone I don't know, my heart is beating and I rely on the Spirit to make my feet move. It's never been easy, but I have enough experience with it always being an adventure, that I'm willing, even though it's always out of my comfort zone.

This time though, was different, and I noticed it. I had a sense of anticipation, joy, expectancy. I didn't know what or why God had me do this... I just knew I was confident, happy, joyful. I pulled up to the church and of course, did not see the man outside any longer. I pulled into the back parking lot and parked in front of what looked like the main entrance. This was a tiny lot, and there were only two other cars in it, parked in front of another door on the far side of the building.

Walking up to the door, I rehearsed what I was going to say, "Hi, this may sound weird, but as I was driving by earlier, the Lord laid on my heart to bring you flowers. He also gave a word of encouragement for you, and I'm here to give them both to you." I can't say these were cognizant thoughts; I knew if I started out with something like that, God would take over and it would be okay.

Well, the door was locked. Which puzzled me. I walked down the steps and looked toward the far building. I thought there might be someone in there because of the cars, so I walked toward the door. As I walked up the three stone steps to the door, I could see the door opened into a room, and in that room were three people. Just three, and it looked like they were either praying or having bible study. I didn't want to interrupt, and I can't say I had a clear, this-is-your-next-step thought, but I knew to knock lightly and open the door a tad.

I walked in, flowers in hand, to three women. One, the tallest, early 30s, walked over to me. The other two just sort of stared at me. I said hello, told them my name, said, "I know this sounds a little weird, but is the guy that was working outside earlier around?" The tall woman said no, do you need something? To which I gave my little speech.

"This may sound weird, but as I was driving by earlier, the Lord laid on my heart to bring him flowers. He also gave a word of encouragement for him, and I'm here to give them both."

Still, the other two ladies, both at least mid 40s sat just staring at me. The tallest said, what is your word for him? So I shared,

"God shared with me that what this man was doing was not simply gardening. He was cultivating, growing things. And the labor he was putting in would one day pay off. It was not about the literal physical work he was doing... it was about what he had been called to do in the Body of Christ. "

One of the women, (D) jumped up and said, "You don't know what just happened!" And there was an uproar, and joy and gasps from these three ladies. My eyes were wide, and I'm like... "what happened?"

D said, "Just before you came to the door, (tall woman) said, "I don't want to wait for someone to bring me flowers when I'm dead, I want flowers now!"

Tall woman (whom I now call Flowers) looked at me and said, "I think that word is for me."She began to tell me how just recently she had been called to be the lead intercessor for this little church. She felt inadequate, young and inexperienced. I now know she has been a faithful prayer warrior on her own, and God is now raising her up to train others to intercede for our region. The word God had given to me edified and strengthened her, encouraged her, and was sealed with flowers at the exact moment she asked for them.

We were all a bit dumbfounded at God and His specific love and specific timing. With all the lolly gagging I did while shopping, with all the time I took picking out the flowers, the door that was locked at first, to come up the stairs at the exact time Flowers exclaimed she wanted flowers was only a feat God Almighty could accomplish.

Can you imagine the joy in that room at that moment? I gladly handed the flowers to Flowers and as I did, we became sisters in the fight. She invited me to come to the weekly intercession prayer meeting which I now attend. In doing so, I've met others who attend other churches but come to intercede at Grace and Mercy for our region. It's an answer to my prayer, to love and pray with others for unity in the Body here in this region.

I've since attended a prayer luncheon Grace & Mercy held and met many others from other churches gathered that day to intercede for our region. Last week my daughter and I went to buy some chicken dinners to support one of their ministries. I saw "V" one of the women I pray with. I said thanks for something she had done for me, and she said, "honey, you're family now."

My Father makes me laugh. This was such a joy filled adventure for me. He could have simply impressed my heart to bring flowers to the church. But He led me to believe for the longest time that they were for some man. And would I obey? Yes. And that alone increases my faith tremendously. And makes me laugh. And it is a joy that my Father knows how to make me laugh!

Such joy. God is funny, good, and kind. I so love Him, and love the adventures He sends us on.

Stories Part 2: A Broken Down Bus Full of #HersheyParkHappy Middle Schoolers

Adventure of the Day - June 3

Emily and I were driving home from dropping Anna off at a friends house last Saturday evening. It was around 7:30pm. Em was driving and we were making our way home via Hershey Park Drive, just west of Rt 39. As we were driving, we saw an older bus with it's hazards on, parked by the side of the road. The bus driver was standing outside, and was on his cell. I had a passing thought of empathy, but not much else. We had *ice cream and root beer in the car and wanted to get home to make floats!

As we passed, I had the impression that I was to go get a case of water for those on the bus. I'm not going to lie, my first thought was.... aww Lord, I just want to get home. But the impression was strong, and I know His Voice when I hear it. I still hesitated but said to Em..."Okay, we're going on an adventure." She would tell you, her first thought was the same as mine. :) But I immediately said, "I got a prompt from the Lord," and she was like, "Okay! Where are we going?" (Can I just say how fun it is and how much easier it is to follow the Spirit on the adventure of the day, when others are willing to go with you? Thank you dear daughter!!)

She pulled into Weis and right in the front vestibule there were cases of water for sale. Perfect! I grabbed one and Em said, "Should we grab two?" I replied, "No, one should be good." As soon as I was in line, the Spirit was like, Go grab another. So Emily(who heard right the first time!) faithfully went and grabbed another and we bought them both.

I drove this time, and we circled back and pulled up behind the bus, that now had a few adults standing outside. As Emily and I came toward the bus, I said to the driver, "Hi! We're here to bring you water!" He called to another woman who came to meet us, and she looked at us and the two cases with disbelief. I told her we were driving by, and the Lord prompted us to pick up some cases of water for her. She got a little weepy and said, "Some of our kids are a little asthmatic, and really needed water." I said, "Oh! God knew that, and sent us to bring it." Meanwhile, because the bus was an older kind of bus, the windows were opened and I could hear kids laughing and singing inside.

It turns out, these kids were Middle Schoolers from West Virginia, on their way home from the Music in the Park competition... they won first place! I asked "Cindy" if I could pray for her, and still weepy, she welcomed it. As I was praying, one of the kids on the bus began to shush the others and said, "Shhhh!!! she's praying!" When I was done, one of the kids said, "Wow! That was a great prayer! You should be a preacher!" Laughing I said, "Well, I'm the wife of a preacher, does that count?" And he was like, "Guys! She's a preachers wife!" Still laughing I said I'd be praying for them as they were shuttled to a nearby hotel for the night, and as Cindy had to now phone all the parents to tell them their kids would be spending the night in Hershey. As Emily and I were leaving, the same boy said, "Hey! Will you pray for me too?" I stopped, turned around and asked him what his name was. "Marcus!" he said. Looking him in the eye I said, "Marcus, I"m going to especially pray blessing on you and for you." He said, "Guys! I'm getting special prayer from the preachers wife!"

So awesome. And pray we did, that Marcus would be a leader among his peers, that his hunger for others to pray into his life would grow, that he would be gifted and empowered through relationship with his Abba Father to reach his generation for Christ. What a great adventure, and what a joy to share it with Emily.

*No ice cream was harmed in this adventure, and Matt said it was the best root beer float he had ever tasted. :)

Stories, Part 1

Adventure of the day, June 6

I just got off the phone with a dear younger sister after praying in authority with her over her daughter. I’ve known her ever since I gave her a ride home from school when I was a theater teacher, over 16 years ago.(Theater teacher, I know, right?) Since then, I’ve watched her rejection of Christ grow into less animosity, to interest, to seeking, to finding, to being reborn and now, having the joy of her first born being baptized last weekend. After the baptism, a guy said he “saw” something in the “spiritual realm” over her daughter before she went into the water. When this guy communicated what he saw, my friend was scared and told him so. She called me, somewhat anxious and asked me to speak into it. I explained to her the authority she has in Christ, and explained how she can walk in it. We then prayed and broke off anything that was not of Jesus spoken over her daughter, and spoke blessing into the life and destiny of her daughter, in the name of Jesus.

Adventure of the day, June 2

She sat in our porch last week, in the white wicker chair with the red patterned cushion, decaf in her hand. She poured out her heart. She doesn’t recall others speaking life into her, only where she was a failure in every relationship she had. 2 ½ years ago, she was invited into community for the first time in her adult life. She’s heard life giving words, and has been prayed over so often in this community, with others speaking and calling out the gifts of the Spirit they see in her, that she is beginning to believe she has value and worth in the Body of Christ. She wants more of the abundant life God has promised. She has seen us, even through the hard times, filled with the Spirit and walking in His gifts. She has seen God resource us with more of Himself and although it still makes her nervous, wanted to pray He would fill her with more of everything He wants to give her. We prayed together in agreement. As we prayed, she received a little healing in an area that has been hurting her for awhile, just because God wanted to give that to her. I didn’t know this until the next day, when God prompted me to text her, asking her about this very area. He laid on my heart that she had an issue with this area, through a word of knowledge about it. By faith I asked her about it. She affirmed she had an issue, told me about the partial healing the day before, and after we prayed, she was completely healed! Woo hoo God!!!

Time and Timing

Originally begun January 25, 2017.......

I was struck by a detail of the story of Issac today. I've read this story many times, but today, as I was reading, the Holy Spirit gave revelation. I need revelation these days, because it's been hard to process what He is doing and where He is leading us as a family. It's been hard to wait, to listen and honestly, to hear. And I'm frustrated that it's been hard to hear. Yet I know He will speak as I am still. But being still has been hard....but that's for another time to write about.

Abraham was faithful to send out his servant to find a wife for Issac. His servant had instructions to go to his family and find a wife. His servant carried all sorts of gifts for the family of the girl he would, by faith, find for his master. He carried what he needed for himself for the journey, as well as all the gifts for her, and for her family on camels as he made the trek. Finally, he ends up at a place where he can rest, where his camels can rest, and he calls on the name of the Lord, asking Him to identify a wife for Issac. He asks that the wife of God's own choosing would be the one who would offer to water his camels, which would be no small feat. Rebekah comes to the watering spot with her own sheep, and after giving water to the servant, offers to water the camels. After he finds out she belongs to Abraham's family, he makes request of her family that she journey back with him to marry Issac. Her family agrees if she agrees. She agrees, and leaves her family, her home, all she has ever known, to journey back with the servant to meet her new husband, and live with him and raise a family.

Issac is the Son of Promise. He knows his own life came about because of the sovereignty of God Himself. He knows he will have descendants as numerous as the stars. He knows the covenant God made with his father Abraham. Issac knows that through his own children, this covenant will continue.

Some time passes. No children. A few years pass. No children. A decade passes. No children. Two decades pass. No children.

My mind was struck by this today. God made a promise. Issac believed it. Rebekah left everything she knew to be the wife of Issac, and I have to think she had a belief in God, had to have a sense of destiny to leave all she knew to become Issac's wife. She went to a land barren of friends, of family, of everything familiar to be.... barren.

What could those years have been like for her? What did she battle in her mind? What regrets did she have, what prayers did she cry out to God? What promises did she cling to? What comfort did she have as day after day, year after year, her purpose, her reason for leaving all she knew, never came to bear, to light? There had to have been a purpose for her too, a reason for the delay. There must have been much the Lord spoke to her as she waited, as Issac waited. Or maybe I just imagine this to be true, want this to be true as I so identify with her situation. But God is a God of Hope, and though Scripture doesn't record what her thoughts about the wait were, she must have been crying out to Him, and I know He heard her.

We know that Issac prayed for her, and she conceived. What were those 9 months like, as she literally felt the promise grow within her? And as the "war within her" of twins grew, before she knew they were twins, what were now her thoughts? Was she afraid she would lose the baby? Did she cry out to God, wondering why this, after such a delay?

5 Months Later

I began this post over 5 months ago, and just now, as I am prepping for another post, saw that I had yet to finish this one. I began writing that as we were in the midst of one probably the hardest seasons our family has ever experienced. We had no home of our own, part time work for both of us, a very clear call on our lives that came after 20 days of fasting and prayer, with no foreseeable resources of our own to "make it happen." We had friends who empathized but no partners in the vision. We had Job friends who thought it must be something we had done to cause such calamity in our lives, and shared this openly with us. And we would soon have people specifically speaking against what God had spoken to us, people we had loved and shared life with.

Like Rebekah, I left everything good to come to Hershey. I had deep friendships in Indiana, joy in serving in my sweet spots, love, others who were on mission and with whom we kept pace, vision for the future, security of a beautiful home with land and a garden that even provided shelter for a young couple living with us. Like Rebekah, we left everything dear to follow what we thought was a promise. Like Rebekah, 5 months ago I asked, "If this is so, why then am I this way?" Why do we find ourselves without a home, without what we thought of as security, struggle with those we had loved, struggle within ourselves. All I could do was cling to the hope that there had to be a reason. God is Faithful. That's all I knew.

What I would say to myself 5 months ago is.... hold on. Things you could not even conceive will happen in a very short amount of time. Within 3 weeks you will be in your new home, (the small kind, the one of your dreams, with hydrangeas, rhododendron, clementis, azaleas, all your favorite perennials, just for you.) People you don't know yet will become key influencers in your life. God will visit others in dreams and tell them about you to encourage and heal you in one of your darkest moments. He will give you mentors to walk out the command to church plant. He will deliver you of strongholds. Your joy will exponentially increase. You will be invited into a body of believers who are closing the gap between what the Bible depicts as the "normal" christian life and what you see in the typical American church. He will open financial resources to follow His call to church plant. He will send you on adventures that require courage but will increase faith and joy. You will see others healed through you. He will be EXACTLY who He says He is and empower you to be EXACTLY who HE says you are... not whom others say or expect you to be.

Oh for the perspective of time in the waiting! Courage dear hearts, as you follow Jesus and wait for His timing!

Time

As a storm buffets a tree it pulls at the seed, trying to take it away from its security high on the branch, surrounded by others of it's kind. From this vantage point, the seed could see all around, see the branches, see how it connected to other seeds, see the fields with countless other trees and seeds just like it. It was growing, secure, and hidden within the tree. Secure it thought, ready to bring forth fruit in due time. But the storm pulls and tugs and will have its way in dislodging the seed from its place. It hurls the seed to the ground. The seed is seemingly lost. It is forgotten, alone, and soon... lonely.  

But God sees it in the secret place. God carefully watches over that seed, and for it's own joy, which it cannot see at the moment. God allows the seed first to be covered by debris, and after a while, to be buried beneath it, to be pushed down into the soil. It is to be worn and eroded and broken by the soil and its surrounding. It is the death of the seed, to be sure, as the earth sets into it. And it is dark, it is a lonely and an alone place.

But here also is where a different life begins to germinate. The seed rested (like a weaned child O God, like a weaned child against its mother is my soul within me) and accepted the circumstances as from God's hand.  There are nutrients in the soil - unknown and unseen perhaps until the seed is buried. The nutrients aren't meant to feed the seed, but to help it die so that the true life within the seed might be brought forth. And that life must come from within the seed - it is the seed's true nature, the purpose for which God created it.

All the seed has known is a violent separating from its home, then burial, then this death. Life, as the seed knew it, is over. It has accepted it's death and is content enough to rest here. Yet it cannot rest long. New life begins within the shell of the seed (for the seed recognizes it's body was but a shell, a casing for this new life) and with this new life, a new hope. Yet the hope somehow also contrasts its own lonliness, it's aloneness. All this trial, difficulty, pain and hurt has been so solitary. There is growth to be sure, but for what purpose? More confinement? More loneliness? Or worse, for itself alone?

Something stirs within the young plant. Surely I was made for more than just myself - surely there is purpose for me too, even beneath the soil? No answer comes. Time, water and food are the only constants. The plant grows and gets stronger. The conviction of purpose grows along with it but the evidence of what it can see speaks to the contrary. The plant continues to grow though, and soon hits what seems to be the reaches of its space. It cannot grow taller yet all within it yearns to stretch farther - but something seems to be blocking - there is no more room! Yet the plant continues to grow, and now it is painful again - it cannot stay where it is, surrounded by the dark and dirt and damp and rotting and it's former shell - it must have more room! There must be more purpose to all this pain!  Is this it? Is this what I have been created for? To exist in this hidden place, alone, with no purpose, no vision, no light? Aren't there others? Surely there are the others! Am I alone?

Then, the deluge. And now the plant fears another kind of death - drowning. This is too dark, too much, too much for life to grow. The plant will die. Though the rain at times is gentle, it is relentless. Other times the rain is so pounding it causes the buried plant to hold onto anything it can find for fear of being driven into deeper darkness. The plant is now gasping for breath, accepting, waiting for death that will surely be the final call through this incessant pounding, this relentless outpouring. Then- a voice - faint through the sorrow and the mud and the years -

Arise! Arise my darling, my beautiful one and come along - for behold the winter is past, the rain is over and gone. Arise my darling - come out of the ground, your temporary tomb, your place of protection as I created my Life within you. Raise your head! Burst forth out of the ground! The deluge made a way for you. Its purpose was to cleanse and break and release you. Raise your head dear one and look at Me! See in Me, My Purpose and plan for you - Raise, oh raise your head from what you thought was your place of death but was My means of generating My Life in you! Oh dear one My Son has gone first - He too was buried for a time - but at the right time - I called Him forth. I rose Him by the power of My Spirit from the dead - His place of death was My means of bringing Life to you! Raise your head dear one  -and look at Me! Find your deepest longings met in Me. Find your yes-es to all of your heart cries. Find My embrace to end all your loneliness. Find, if you still need, My reasons for your burial, your death and now, your resurrection. (Yes, there are many such resurrections that I will offer to you. Many are willing to die... not many are willing to be resurrected!)

And look around dearest one! See where I have planted you? Look at the field. Look at the others I have planted. I brought them here, perhaps not from the same tree or by the same means, but nonetheless, I brought them here to My field to be planted in the hidden place, the secret place for a season so at the right time I might bring to Myself a harvest of many, ready to bear My fruit. Look around. You have not been alone, though you could not see. Look around. The time is right. The time is ripe. I will feed many through you. What I have taught you my beloved, in the hidden, will be food for many. But though you are now being brought out of the hidden into the seen, continue to cultivate a hidden life. Be with Me in the secret place. There is more of My life I desire to cultivate, germinate in you. Will you accept My invitation to go again, now that you know the pain? I know you will my much loved one. You do not despise the hidden. Indeed-you have not. Press into the lonely places even as My Son did. There, rich treasure continues to hide in the open for you. Just for you. You are My Beloved. In you dearest, I am well pleased.

That Where I Am

John 14
"Let not your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me.  In My Father's house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you: for I go to prepare a place for you.  And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you to Myself: that where I am, (there) you may be also. And you know the way where I am going. ... I am the way and the truth and the life: no one comes to the Father but through Me....And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever: (that is) the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not behold him or know Him, (but) you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you. .... I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you...After a little while the world will behold Me no more; but you (will) behold Me; because I live, you shall live also.... If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word, and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make our abode (dwelling place!) with him. In that day you shall know that I am in My Father and you in Me, and I in you. 


It wasn't until a few years ago that I really began to look at this passage. When Jesus said, "I go to prepare a place for you," I assumed He meant He would die, go to heaven, get everything ready, and then we would either die and go to heaven and live in one of those dwelling places, or that He would come back and whisk us away to join Him to live there (I preferred the latter). I remember being blown away by the thought that Jesus wasn't just talking about going to heaven to prepare this ginormous place with a ton of rooms (dwelling places) in it. He was also talking about preparing a relationship for me with Himself.

Jesus, in John 14 is in the Upper Room, having the Passover Meal with His friends. He knew in a few short hours, He would be betrayed, judged, and crucified. But He also knew that only through His crucifixion, burial, resurrection and ascension could I come into relationship with Abba Father. The dwelling place that He was preparing for me was in my own heart, a dwelling place for Father, Son, Holy Spirit to dwell in relationship with me. The many dwelling places were the hearts of many people who would also put their faith in Christ's death, burial, resurrection and ascension, resulting in relationship with Abba Father.

The other day I was thinking on these few verses again, and the Holy Spirit revealed something else to me as I meditated on the verse:

And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you to Myself: that where I am, (there) you may be also. 

Jesus wants me to be with Him. Like, right now, this moment.  In John 17:3 He prays,

Father, I desire that they also, whom You have given Me, be with Me where I am, in order that they may behold My glory, which You have given Me. For You did love Me before the foundation of the world. 

It is true that heaven is the dwelling place that Jesus' death, burial, resurrection and ascension bought: (Revelation 21)

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth; for the first heaven and the first earth passed away, and there is no longer any sea.  And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, made ready as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne, saying, “Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men, and He will dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself will be among them,

but it is also true that the place of Jesus' dwelling, His abiding, is in me, my own heart.  He desires relationship with me. But, He desires this relationship in an ongoing manner. (John 15) He doesn't desire this so that He can now be my "co-pilot" and come with me where ever I go. He desires me to be where He is so that I can see His glory, see what He is doing, see Him. 

In this relationship with God, I now have an ability to know the heart of the Father through the Spirit (1 Cor 2:9-13) to go with Him where He goes, to love with Him whom He loves, to follow Him into the hard places, the dark places, because He desires everyone to know Him. 

God has not rescued me so that I can now live out my own agenda with power. He has rescued me because He loves me. And this love is so incredible, so unbelievable, so fulfilling and joyful and life-giving, that out of the overflow of it, He empowers me to love others whom He is drawing to Himself. Loving others can look like serving, encouraging, praying, or sharing the truth of who He is. It can look like mourning with those who mourn, and rejoicing with those who rejoice. It can look like forgiving others, hating what is evil and clinging to what is good, providing for others needs, and even leaning into the sanctification process so that others will see Jesus more clearly through me. But at the end of the day, my life is no longer my own. 

It is not that I am saved to have God's blessing to do what I want with my life. It's that I am rescued to play a part in the rescue of others. And I can't even do that apart from His Spirit at work in me. 

The question is not, "God will You bless my work today?" The question is, "God, where are You at work today and how may I join You in it, through the love and power of Yourself dwelling in me?"